mess.mess.mess.

In all honesty,
I am a mess. I think so. I want a fresh start.
But I'm stuck.
.
I'm back to where I was two years ago...w.t.f.?
I hate that I even depend.
I hate that I let myself depend.
I'm angry that I trust.
I'm angry that I love.
I'm angry that I let things go.
I hate to pretend.
I'm upset that I can't expect anything.
Because honestly; there is nothing to expect.
I'm unsatisfied. I'm not happy.

foolish-ashanti

Aside from my emotional lack of a love kind of life my computer is shit. I gain weight by smelling food.
I'm a sad little dependent girl. I'm 21 but I felt like I got pushed back to being 16. It sucks.
I want to get out of this little shit hole I'm in but I really don't know where to start.
& I hate feeling so helpless. I think I'm a product of learned helplessness. At least the way I grew up.
I want my period to hurry the fck up so I can get done with all this emotional bullshit.